Why We Confess
Haley Jonna
Scripture and the traditions of the earliest Catholics make it clear that God wants us to receive His mercy through the Sacrament of Reconciliation.1 But, in recent years there has been a steady decline in the number of Catholics that go to Confession. While there are a variety of reasons why people avoid the confessional, there are better reasons as to why God asks us to experience his love in this way.
God knows how to reach us in our broken human nature, and He wants to create a clear path for us toward sharing in His own abundant life, joy, and happiness – not just after our death, but while we are here on Earth. In this article, we will dive into how God uses the Sacrament of Reconciliation to give us four gifts: (1) Humility; (2) Accountability; (3) Guidance; and (4) a Physical Sign of God’s Mercy.
1. Humility – Confession helps us grow in humility by causing us to reflect on how we’re living our lives and on the areas that we need to improve. People often think of humility as a lowering of oneself. But humility is actually accepting the truth of who we are as individuals created in God’s image and likeness. It’s acknowledging our strengths and weaknesses, accepting that we are imperfect, and knowing we can live a better and fuller life through reliance on our Creator. The humblest saints knew their value to God. They understood how small we are in comparison to Him, but just as importantly, they understood that as powerful and majestic as our God is, his love and mercy for each of us individually and by name is just as powerful, just as majestic.
Mary is our greatest example of humility. It’s through her that Jesus was able to save the world. Because she was conceived without the stain of original sin, she was as close to perfect as we get; yet, we know her as “mild” and “meek.” That’s because Mary understood God’s love and mercy for the world better than any of us. She most intimately experienced the power of the Holy Spirit. Our Mother never lowered herself to be any less than she was. She just understood that God is still that much greater. Knowing His awesomeness, He was all she desired. In all of His magnificence and His glory, He wants to meet and heal us in the confessional. There’s nothing more humbling than that.
The more often you receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation, the more you will grow in humility and the easier it will be for you to make the practice a consistent part of your life. A trusting humility brings us back into the light of communion between the Father and his Son and with one another.2 Humility is not passive. Again, look to Mary and her strength. She said “yes” to her role as the Mother of Christ, she prompted Jesus to begin His public ministry at the wedding of Cana, she stood at the foot of Jesus’ cross as He was crucified, and she was a pillar for the disciples after Jesus’ resurrection. She knew very well that God had equipped her to take on her role as a co-redemptrix in our salvation. Humility gives us awareness of our strengths and the courage to use them to create a better world and to achieve our purpose.
Finally, humility is a remedy for the shame that we all experience as a natural consequence of sin. The cause of shame is pride, a vice that causes us to have an elevated and inaccurate view of our own self-importance. Humility cures shame by putting who we are in proper perspective. By giving us the gift of Reconciliation, God tells us that He knows this life is difficult, and He knows that we will fail, but we don’t have to define ourselves by our failures. We can surrender to Him, turn to Him for mercy, and rely on Him to take us through our days. In turn, He will show us the greatness He intends for each of our lives.
2. Accountability. Accountability is a willingness to accept responsibility for our actions. While the gift of humility allows us to be honest with ourselves, the gift of accountability allows us to be honest with others. The effects of individual sin are not limited to the sinner. We each have hurt others by our sin and have been hurt by the sins of others. While we can’t control the sins of those around us or how their sins will affect our lives, by holding ourselves accountable for our own actions, we take responsibility for the part we’ve played in causing harm to ourselves and to others.
For example, in the Gospel of John, the Pharisees bring Jesus a woman who committed adultery. They reference the law of Moses which commands that they stone her for her actions. Jesus responds, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.”3 When we are quick to blame others for the brokenness of our world, we push those people further away from us and sometimes from Christ. On the other hand, when we hold ourselves accountable, we recognize that we all make mistakes, and we can only heal through trust in God’s mercy.
In order to live better lives, we have to identify the consistent sins in our lives. Confessing often and, if possible, to a regular confessor allows us to hold ourselves accountable for change. Regular examinations of conscience and identifying the sin in our lives is the first step toward remedying our hearts. We know this by looking to the lives of the saints, including two of the greatest saints of our time, Saint John Paul II and Saint Mother Teresa of Calcutta, who would confess their sins weekly. Saint John Paul once said, “Those who go to Confession frequently and do so with the desire to make progress will notice the strides that they make in their spiritual lives.”
In St. Paul’s letter to the Romans, he says that at our death, “each one of us shall give account of himself to God.”4 By holding ourselves accountable for our lives while here on Earth, we become better prepared to face God at our death. He doesn’t want us to wait until we die to experience His love and joy in heaven. He wants us to experience it here and now, and He makes that possible through the sacraments.
3. Guidance. The third gift we receive from the Sacrament of Reconciliation is guidance. Because the priests are sworn to secrecy, the confessional is meant to be a safe space for all who enter. We also usually have the opportunity to remain anonymous by confessing behind a screen or curtain. The priest is meant to act as a guide and a companion in the faith. For those who haven’t been to Confession in a while and who may be concerned about not knowing how to confess, the priest is there to guide you through your confession and help you take the right steps to meet Jesus. As part of your confession, the priest will give you a penance, a plan to grow in prayer or to move forward toward living a better life. The penance is meant to help form the conscience and teach us to pray. Most of us seek the guidance of experts on a daily basis. We go to doctors when we’re ill, mentors at work, and teachers in school. God welcomes us to the church through Confession so we can receive guidance from the priests.
4. Physical Sign of God’s Mercy. The sacraments are visible signs of an invisible grace. They are pathways that Christ laid out for us to meet Him “physically” as well as spiritually. While the sacraments are not the only way that God works in our lives, we believe they are the only way we can be certain that God is working. While no one on Earth can speak directly to the power of Christ’s mercy even absent the Sacrament of Reconciliation, going to Confession is the only way we can know for sure that we’ve received God’s mercy. In the Gospel of John, after Jesus’ resurrection, he tells the apostles, the first priests of our Church, to go and forgive sins. Jesus said to them, “As the Father has sent me, even so I am sending you… Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”5 In the Sacrament of Reconciliation, the priest stands in for God and verbally speaks the words of absolution. “…May God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.” While Christ delegated this responsibility to them, the priests do not forgive our sins. Only God has that power. But hearing those words out loud and in person, being affirmed by them that we have received Christ’s mercy, allows us to move forward with our lives in peace.
This doesn’t mean that the Sacrament of Reconciliation is an immediate fix to all things wrong in our lives. Sometimes we may leave feeling more whole than ever, and other times we may leave just as we did when we first entered. The important thing is that we recognize with faith that even if we can’t directly experience God’s love and mercy in that moment, He is working in our lives.
If you haven’t been to Confession in a while, it can be scary. Actually, even when you go regularly, it can be scary. It’s uncomfortable to look at our lives and recognize our weak nature. It’s even more uncomfortable to be vulnerable and express that weak nature to a priest. Discomfort is the surest path to growth. God is great, and if we welcome Him into our lives, He will fill the holes.
Reflection: “When Christ shall come with shout of acclamation and take me home, what joy shall fill my heart. Then I shall bow, in humble adoration and then proclaim, “My God, how great thou art!”
1. Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2nd Ed. (1422 – 1498)
2. Catholic Church, 2631
3. The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. John 8
4. The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. Romans 14:12
5. The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. John 20: